Earlier today Candy Bear, Prime minster of Swimsuit Top (North of Bikini Bottom), has raised the tax in swimsuit top from 0.1%, which is already a lot, to 5% of your monthly $10000 income!
This unnecessary, big change to the tax, will now have you paying 0.0005 c per month! When it used to be 0.00001, which is still extremely pricy!
Prime minister Candy Bear, has now been found guilty of a few crimes.
Not long ago she was lying down on blass, with her two friends, Sully James Sullivan (Before being prosecuted for farting), and me, Slushie Spaghetti. Candy Bear was talking about a pleasant robbery of the Wazowski family, and how the person who robbed it would it would surely get a medal of honour.
‘She was chatting about it for quite a while, when she suddenly started farting. She farted five times in a row and shortly after farting (five hours), she started burping, and she burped five times in a row too!’ Reports Sully James Sullivan.
Shortly after burping me and Sully realised that Candy was wiggling a bit. For some time we thought she was just scaring of the worms, but after some long amount of time (1/1,000,000 of a second), she said she needed to go to the TOILET!
Now me and Sully were REALLY creeped out. We decided, in the end to call the police and report these stupendous crimes. But because of her status she wasn’t put into jail, though she did have to pay a small penalty of $100,000,000.
We think she wants to use such little amount of money on else, so that is why she is making such a high price on tax.
More News to come about this!
Follow us on this website and become alerted whenever a new newspaper comes out!
By Slushie Spaghetti
Earlier today, local resident Octopus went out to a Japanese restaurant called, 'Shira Nui', for some lunch. He had all of these dishes for his private lunch with his family. Apetiser: Creamy Japenese Noodle Main: Miso Soup, Orange Juice, Tempura Prawn Udon, Green Tea. He tried lots of them with pleasure. Local Resident Octopus tries Shira Nui tempura prawn. Local Resident Octopus tries Shira Nui Udon Noodle. Here is the over all scores for everything he tried in Shira Nui: Apetiser: 5/5 Udon: 5/5 Miso Soup: 100/5 Orange Juice: 10,00/5 Green Tea: 0/5 Overall Rating: 10,00/6 Restaurant Details: Main Chef/ Owner: Hiro Nishikura Address: 247 Springvale road Glen Waverley 3150 Victoria Phone: +61 03 9886 7755 Follow us on this website! For Business Inquiries ONLY Email: firstname.lastname@example.org By Slushie Spaghetti
Local Resident, Sully van Sullivan of the swimsuit top, has farted in his OWN local home. Civilians are devastated, as being a brilliant and sensible role model, they were expecting more than committing such a frowned upon crime. Sullivan, is yet to be, with no hesitation, prosecuted serving a lifetime in jail. That frizzy monster is not to be scaring anymore! Along with the major disappointment, some have also been trying to get Sullivan into court, instead of a life time in jail. Although, they KNOW they have no pleasure in farts, they still want to alter the jail time to sixty years in prison. Sully, in fact, frowns up on himself with great disappointment, looking at the mirror at times and yelling to himself, "SULLY VAN SULLIVAN!I AM SO DISAPPOINTED, FARTING IS A CRIME! CHILDREN WILL NOW FROWN UPON YOU!". By Slushie Spaghetti